By Gabriel Ruiz – I recently learned that nearly half of Americans believe people have become ruder since the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020. To be honest, I’m surprised the statistics aren’t higher. The notion that individuals we encounter in our daily lives are ruder than in the past is not a new concept. One need only invoke the age-old expression “Kids these days” to evoke a multitude of stereotypes regarding how the ‘next generation’ contributes to a decline in societal consideration and taste.
Beyond generational differences, there are discrepancies in what behaviors may be perceived as overtly disrespectful by one person and completely innocuous by another. Depending on various factors, it is not always easy to discern a stranger’s intentions (or lack thereof) until you become acquainted with them on a more personal level. This brings me to my main point.
A debate over what constitutes ‘rude’ behavior could continue indefinitely, but the claim that people have become ruder specifically since the COVID-19 pandemic invites an interesting discussion. One point on which everyone can agree is that the use of social media and technology for social interaction has increased dramatically since 2020.
The internet served as a lifeline during the pandemic, enabling us to substitute traditional forms of communication at a time when opportunities for in-person interaction in public or work settings were scarce. Connecting with friends became limited to phone and video calls. Across the country, many employees transitioned to working from home. Additionally, delivery services emerged as the new norm for running errands. Even as pandemic restrictions have eased and we can once again socialize in person, the collective reliance on technology that we developed throughout the pandemic continues to this day.
We can examine the impact of in-home isolation on the perceived increase in rudeness from two perspectives. The first perspective considers how lockdowns have influenced the behavior of Americans towards one another. I will refer to these as the ‘Behavioral’ and ‘Perceptive’ lenses, respectively.
The behavioral lens is quite straightforward. Socializing is a skill, and like any skill, it requires practice to develop and maintain. While technology has allowed us to stay connected during the pandemic, many aspects of social behavior are lost over the screen. So, when the only in-person interactions you have are with your immediate family and the occasional DoorDash delivery driver, it is understandable that people may not be as considerate or attuned to how they treat others as they once were.
The perceptive lens is more nuanced. It is hardly revolutionary to point out how social media has caused us to become more divided, particularly in the political arena. However, this issue extends beyond politics and even predates social media. It starts with something that has been around as long as humanity, our suspicion of the unknown, a tendency that social media has only exacerbated since the lockdown. Consider how many people you encounter on any given day. Now, reflect on how many of those interactions occur in person versus through your phone. Social media often highlights the worst in others. While we may logically understand that parents on YouTube who exploit their crying children for views do not represent the majority of parents in the country, we are inherently pattern-seeking creatures. If we are constantly exposed to compilations of parents behaving inconsiderately toward their children, we will naturally become more attuned to signs of such behavior in our daily lives. This heightened awareness can lead us to project those negative traits onto individuals and situations where we lack context. I recently came across a fascinating study titled “Rude Color Glasses: The Contaminating Effects of Witnessed Morning Rudeness on Perceptions and Behaviors Throughout the Workday,” which I felt compelled to mention. For the sake of brevity, I will omit the technical details, but I highly recommend giving it a thorough skim. The study encapsulates much of what I am discussing regarding the inextricable link between perception and behavior. I will include a link to the full study at the bottom of this post.
The latter perspective does not negate the former; rather, it may be crucial in addressing the social atrophy that has developed from our prolonged time indoors. Our understanding of the world and the people we share it with has increasingly, and for some exclusively, been shaped by social media algorithms designed to exploit our reactivity. We must consider how our perceptions of individuals in our community can influence our behavior toward them and vice versa. This concept is illustrated by a psychological phenomenon, also known as ‘The Pygmalion Effect’ which explains:
“Others’ beliefs about us shape their conduct toward us.
Their conduct toward us influences our beliefs about ourselves.
These beliefs, in turn, impact our actions toward others.”
I will include a link to a more in-depth analysis of the Pygmalion Effect at the end of this post. It is important to recognize that we can either perpetuate cycles of assumption and distrust towards our fellow human beings or take the first step to break free from these cycles by challenging our perceptions and altering our behavior.
chrome-extension://efaidnbmnnnibpcajpcglclefindmkaj/https://people.uncw.edu/hakanr/documents/Rudepriming.pdf
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