End of the Semester

The end of the semester is here. Meaning I’m in the middle of a final project for one class and a final paper for another class.

Last weekend, life happened and I got sick. The sickness didn’t last long, but because I was sick, I couldn’t focus on doing my homework. Putting me behind two days from where I wanted to be. I was pushing myself to stay up late the previous night to complete tomorrow’s assignment because I couldn’t do it over the weekend.

Except last night, I was on the fence between keeping myself well and doing homework for class the next day. I feel like I shouldn’t have been on the fence about wanting to put myself first and taking care of myself over homework. What does that say about our society that we make students choose between their well-being and academics?

That being said, I’ve never turned in homework late before. I’ve always been punctual and I participate in class. I decided to ask my professor for an extension with hopes that I get it.

I just hate being that kid asking the professor to give me an extension, when everyone else has their own life to worry about but still managed to get their work done on time. I’m only trying.

Not So New, New Girl

A place for my thoughts, basically a week and two days ago today, i was kicked out of my house and I moved into my friend’s. I don’t think it’s weird that i live there, but it might be a little strange to others.

I live with three boys. I sleep on the couch and I’m not even mad.

Now, i don’t want people to think i moved in with complete strangers. The friend who took me in is apart of my MAC Familia, we’ve been working together all year. Another used to work the commuter connection and the last i didn’t really know, but have seen him around and have had him in classes. So, not strangers but not best friends either.

Ever since i moved out of my old house, things in my personal life have gone exceedingly well. Living at home i had trouble eating, i just wasn’t hungry and if i was i never ate much and i just shrugged it off thinking that i wasn’t feeling well. Now that i live with the boys, i’m constantly hungry, a normal thing for me to be and i actually eat. I also couldn’t sleep by myself, i was petrified of the dark, I had to sleep with a nightlight and even with that i still found myself waking up in a cold sweat with my nightmares close behind. Since moving into my new home, i haven’t had any nightmares and i’ve been able to sleep in the dark. I keep telling myself that maybe it’s just a mind thing, but here i feel safe. To top it all off my anxiety has also gone down. I’m still easily frightened, but i don’t find myself stressed out as much living here then i did when i was living at home.

My dad keeps wanting me to move back in and pressing me to tell him who i live with. I don’t want to move back home and i don’t think he needs to know where i live. I don’t want to leave something where i’m perfectly safe behind for a place that could potentially ruin me once more. The only tricky part is telling my family, i live with three boys.

One of my roommates keeps saying we’re like New Girl and I’ve never seen the show New Girl but from what i read, thats my new life in a nutshell. We don’t match the characters perfectly, but we all have out own interesting story lines. Something that is helping my writing, but i don’t think my roommates and friends are ready for the world to hear our stories. The shitty part of it all is i don’t know how this all ends and if there even is a happy ending.

How great would that be to get a happy ending?

Hey girl. Whatcha’ doing?
Hey girl. Where you going?
You get down, and make a frown;
She’ll come turn, turn, turn it around;
She’ll come turn, turn, turn it around
Who’s that girl? (Who’s that girl?)
Who’s that girl? (Who’s that girl?)
It’s Diane!