The waiting room was the same as it had been for almost twenty-two years. Reilly knew she was going to have to change doctors soon but didn’t really want to worry about it right now. She was more worried about the really big needle.
“Reilly?” She looked up, stood, and walked toward the nurse, “How is your day?”
“I just got out of class,” Reilly answered, expecting that to be enough to tell the nurse about her day. She wasn’t scared per say, she just didn’t really like needles and that made her not very talkative.
“Can you step on the scale, please?” Reilly did, and she watched as the numbers crept upwards and stopped at 180 pounds. She winced. “So you’re a Senior this year?”
“Yes, and I already know that I need a new doctor soon. I’m working on it,” Reilly replied. She just wanted to get the shot and leave.
“Do you want to get your flu shot while you’re here?”
“Do I need it?” Reilly answered. Her question was met with a look of disapproval where the eyebrows were raised and bunched together. “I guess, if I need it.”
She hadn’t planned on coming in for two shots, but here she was. She sighed. She followed the nurse back to where she was going to get her shots and sat down. Bracing herself, she watched the nurse prep the needle. It definitely wasn’t short; it was probably about three or four inches she guessed.
The first needle went into her left shoulder. She winced and it stung as the nurse finished with the flu shot. She groaned as she thought about the next shot…in her butt.
Walking out of the office she was sore and numb in her left arm and the right, fleshy side of her hip.
“Do I need to pay for these?” Reilly asked as she approached the front desk.
“Nope, your insurance covered it. Also, don’t forget that you are almost out of time with us here.” Reilly nodded, and turned to walk away, rubbing her arm as she went.
What was the same about the waiting room? Same magazines? Same furniture?
The dialogue works. Especially when you sort of foreshadow having to change doctors. She thinks it, then brings it up in conversation. But as a response to a different question. Obviously it’s weighing on her mind. Then the second nurse’s reminder. Do they want to get rid of her? Is she feeling abandoned?
Good reaction to the nurse’s raised eyebrows.
You were good at incorporating description and dialogue throughout your story, which makes it easier to read and helps the reader feel more involved in the story. The story is also easy to relate to , for me at least, because I hate needles and getting weighed at the doctor’s office too.