I don’t recall what I put for comments on the draft, but this is a bit long. You want to put the focus on just the most imortant piece of the story. The more stories you try to tell, the more possibility there is for confusion.
A question will work, but not every time.
I like the way you did attribution toward the end.
I don’t recall what I put for comments on the draft, but this is a bit long. You want to put the focus on just the most imortant piece of the story. The more stories you try to tell, the more possibility there is for confusion.
A question will work, but not every time.
I like the way you did attribution toward the end.