My whole life changed 9 months ago when I received an unexpected phone call. I remember exactly what I was doing and where I was at the time. I was in my living room on the couch when my Iphone rang out. On the other end of the phone was a scared-sounding girlfriend which made me begin to worry. “Dayne, I’m pregnant,” she cried to me nervously. In that moment my stomach dropped down to my ass. That was the last thing that I was expecting to hear. She confirmed the news and that was that.
At the time I was so scared, I didn’t know what to do with myself. Thinking, “I’m just a kid myself,” in my head, “how am I going to raise one?” I thought about how I was going to break the news to my parents, just didn’t know what my next move would be at all. I felt like I had a knot in my stomach for the next 2 weeks! Once she told me for sure that she wanted to keep it, I knew that everything was real; I wasn’t dreaming.
It was early May and I was still finishing up at school, so I figured I would tell my parents once I got back home to Kansas City for the summer. Every time I talked to my parents I felt guilty because I still had something to tell them but I just didn’t know when the right time was so I put it off more almost 2 more months. Whenever I told myself “Okay just go ahead, you have to tell them now,” I would start to, but the words just didn’t come out.
One night, I got home from playing basketball and everything hit me so heavy. I was sweaty and nasty from playing basketball, so I hopped in a flaming hot shower. Once I got out, I looked myself in the mirror and said, “F*** it!” After a deep breath, I walked over to my mother and said “Mama, I gotta talk to you about something.” As a son you can feel your mothers energy and at that moment I could sense that she already knew what I was about to tell her. “Go talk to your dad,” she told me once we finished talking. I wasn’t as nervous to talk to my dad about it because I knew he would be more understanding. It was always tough love with me and my father and he raised me to take care of business, so I pretty much knew how that conversation would go.
I walked upstairs to my parents room where my dad was watching TV in the dark, preparing to go to bed. I sat down next to him slowly and asked about the show he was watching just to break the ice. I had to break the news sooner or later. “Congratulations then,” he said in a bit of a sarcastic tone once I told him I was expecting a child, but I knew he actually meant it. My father told me essentially that it’s time to be a man and that I had to live for something bigger than just myself now. The conversation went a lot better than I expected and I knew it was time to work my butt off to be able to support a child.
Knowing that I was working in order to support someone else’s life now was definitely a different feeling and it still didn’t feel real to me. We were expecting to have him around December 15th, so by the time I told my parents it was pretty far along and in no time the child would be here. In early October, we had a gender reveal where I found out that I was having a son which is what I figured. My mother also guessed it would be a boy since she has 1 sister and 4 brothers. It excited me that I would have a little mini me that I could teach football and basketball to.
By that tis time I was settled in and had fully come to fruition with the fact that I was having a son and I made it a priority to make every appointment. We figured out that he was restricted growth, which meant we would likely have to have him early. After numerous hospital visits and appointments with high risk doctors, we came up with a date that would work for the both of us for her to give birth to him. We decided on November 26, 2024.
That morning, I was nervous but I made my way to the hospital early and was ready to sit in that room for however long it took for my son to come. Surprisingly, it only took 5 hours for him to come after she was induced. He was ready to get out of there!
On November 26 at 12:58 am, Xakai was born. At 5 lbs 15 oz and 19 inches, he couldn’t have come out more perfect in my eyes. Before I knew it, the nurse had put scissors into my hand and asked me if I was going to cut the cord, which I did with no hesitation. Watching someone give birth was very intense but I didn’t even flinch
Once I got to hold my son I really felt my life change for good. Holding him was one of the best feelings that I have had as a man and I’m glad to say that my thoughts on being a father changed drastically from the time I found out I was having one, to now. Being a father for the first couple weeks has already taught me a lot, and I know it will be hard but everything will be all worth it in the end since I’m doing what I do for someone greater than me. Xakai has changed my life for good and for the better.
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