Reilly's Ramblings

These last two years of college has brought the thought into my head of “Why don’t I have a boyfriend?” There are two answers to this question.

One, I am very focused on my education and want to graduate from Morningside College with a bachelor’s of arts degree in Mass Communications.  Two, my social life is going to work, to the grocery store, and helping my mom clean the house and yard.

I have this debate in my head almost every day, and I always pick school over having a decent, healthy social life that includes having a boyfriend. Ever since I came to Morningside, this feeling of loneliness is dominating my mindset. But I feel like I’m not the only one with this feeling on campus.

My mom says, “Everyone will feel lonely.”

I’m just too focused on my future and not looking at the present. I mean I have checked out a few guys on campus, it’s not like I’m not looking at all. It just I’m not checking out or dating the first guy that I see.

My dearest and understanding mother says, “For you, you are goal-oriented.”

That I know, for sure, is true. My mom is my best friend, and I can go to her for everything and anything. So going to her about this lingering problem was much more challenging than I thought. My thought was that she would feel that I’m odd and weird, but as it turned out, she’s having the problem as me but in the early-50’s version.

She has to get out there and have a healthy social life too, like me. Like people say, ‘Like mother, like daughter.’ She puts it best about why I am in college and not to have a boyfriend or even a social life.

“You’re there to get a piece of paper, a significant piece of paper, that will stay with you for life.”

Having a college degree is very important for that dream job I always want. Especially in the money that I will be making in the position.

“It makes a big difference in your income.”

I wish that I can have the best of both worlds. I want to have a great boyfriend and be successful in school and out of school. The thing is that I have a crush on a guy that I saw in the library a couple of time. I know that it weird but that’s life for you.

It all depends on what my mindset is and what I want my life to be at this point. I am more worry about my happiness than making others happy. But it is what it is. Life will always be complicated, and that is something that I will have to live with forever.

My mom says, overall “it’s what you want in life.”