Playing the Trump Card

December 8, 2011

I am so freaking excited for the GOP debate hosted by Donald Trump. When Herman Cain dropped out of the race I figured the absurdist quality of the GOP race would go down. There would still be crazy mind you, but Cain added an element of comedy that made the whole thing watchable. He quoted the Pokemon Movie in his speech announcing his suspended campaign. We’re never going to see anybody with that kind of oblivious moxie for a while. At least I thought so. Until Trump jumped back into the spotlight. I’m not interested in what the candidates have to say. I’m much more excited for the adversarial nature of Trump against the candidates. The ones who show up anyway. It’s interesting to see how this is splitting the Republicans. Romney, Huntsman, and Paul have all declined to appear in the debate, probably noticing that it is being moderated by an insane egomaniac. Palin really seems keen on the idea. In her usual eloquent self, she even talks about going if she were a candidate. The split seems to be with candidates who take a more traditional route to the presidency (Romney and company) and candidates who are in it for the attention (everyone else). Will the traditional route work though? Who knows. I do have more respect for the candidates not appearing but I wish they would. The amount of quotable insanity that comes out of this debate should be legendary. Don’t disappoint me Mr. Trump. This campaign has been the best/weirdest/saddest one I’ve ever seen and I don’t want to see that go away anytime soon.

Colonel Cain’s Last Stand

December 1, 2011

Herman Cain is the Rocky Balboa of the GOP right now. He keeps getting slammed but no matter how hard he gets hit, no matter how many times he has to get his eyebrow cut, he staggers back up. It’s really impressive for the sheer amount of perseverance involved. I don’t know if Herman Cain had an affair with Ms. White but I wouldn’t be surprised if he had. If you’re the CEO of a company named Godfather’s, you could be operating a heroin smuggling ring out of the back and I wouldn’t be surprised. What’s really interesting about this story, is the spin and second guessing of the media. The comparison to a zombie was my favorite pundit comment. They’ve smelled blood and they are swarming like sharks. They want Herman Cain to flare out in a blaze of shame and moral judgement. But I don’t know if he will. This has been a really weird campaign for Republicans and I don’t know if the rules apply anymore. Pundits screamed the death of Gingrich’s campaign earlier this year and now he’s surging in the polls. (This is also very funny as Gingrich had two affairs, whereas Cain only had one) It will be a sad if Black Walnut cracks. I fear it will just cause the other crazy people in the race to drop out and make the GOP nominations so much more boring.