Bass Field
Bass field might just seem like a useless grass field that, for some reason, gets watered five times a day but to a select few people it’s a place to escape from the constant stress of school and work. The field allows you to stretch your legs like a gazelle and, for the moment, relax and forget about the Physics test that you have to take at 8 am.
If you live in Dimmitt or the Plex you might not know why Bass field is always cut to a fine trim and smelling like fresh cut grass. But to the people living in Roadmen and the apartments Bass Field is in their backyard and they know all about the amazing activities that happen there. The early morning dew on the field will leave your feet soaked to the bone but for those brave, or tardy, souls it might be worth it when you only have a few minutes to get to class.
Students take advantage of the pristine field any time they have some free time between classes and studying. It’s where students can go and play a small or big sweaty game of ultimate Frisbee or play intramurals.
When the sun starts to set, a herd of people comes out for relief from schoolwork. Around 5pm to dark the field is filled will all kinds of people and they are one of the friendliest people at Morningside College. They are always asking people that are walking down the sidewalk to come join them to play. Even though they might not know the person the players are always welcoming new people. The field is home both to students that spontaneously put together pick-up games as well as scheduled competitive intramurals. One student, and a close friend of mine, Jesse LaFramboise spends his free time on Bass field to escape from school. He said “it a nice play to go to clear my head after homework and meet new friends.”
If you live in Roadman or the apartments, during intramural matches you can hear the cheering of spectators and the players encouraging each other. To most people Bass field is just a waste of space but to some students it’s a place where they can enjoy the outdoors and have fun with their friends.
September 11th, 2012 at 17:10
I really like how you describe the physical appearance of Bass Field, but then you go even further to talk about students’ feelings towards it. The second paragraph did a lot more to draw me in than the first. Maybe you could use that as the lede instead? Also, it’s missing a quote. Maybe you could ask someone about playing ultimate frisbee on the field. There are also quite a few grammatical errors. But, I really did enjoy reading the piece and it was an interesting perspective.
September 12th, 2012 at 22:39
Hannah makes some good comments, Gage. I think she’s right about the second graf being the focus of the article. You want everything in the article to work together to make one point. Much of the piece focuses on how students use and interact with Bass Field, which makes the “in their backyard” phrase central.
You’re primarily using objective detail. You might try to add more subjective reaction, but then back it up with good detail.
Finally, proofread for spelling and punctuation.
A good start, Gage.